Moving Forward

I’ve been taking a lot of mental notes the past few months. Mental notes of my well being, who I’m surrounding myself with, and what those people do or say. Over the past six months I’ve been very selective with who I surround myself with, it’s so important to pay attention to who you’re with when you feel yourself coming alive again after a period of struggle. Outside of my close friends, I also have people who occasionally check in on me or comment “you look happy”, which I really love simply because I AM happy. My goal is to radiate love and happiness so others may reflect that back onto me - I always hope to be a light for other people in that sense. And as much as I love that compliment, it’s normally followed with a phrase that I can’t quite wrap my head around. “I’m glad to see you’ve moved on”. What exactly are they referring to? And what is the standard of how to measure if someone has moved on from something difficult in their life? By any measure, I am happy. My life is good. I am healthy. Dare I say, I’m thriving? But I have not moved on. Before you raise your eyebrows and exit it out of my blog, hear me out. Past situations no longer hold any power or control over my emotions but I still have not moved on. Moving on implies that key events in my life are only moments and that I should leave behind and forget ever happened. Now I’ve said this a million times and you’ll probably see it a million more, you cannot love yourself but hate the experiences that made you. Whatever situation that has taken place in your life that society has convinced you that you must “move on” from, they’re wrong. That experience has shaped you into who you are today, brought the love and friendships into your life you want, has brought new opportunities, and has given you space to grow. I have not moved on - from my break up, from hiccups in my childhood, from bad friendships, from self loathing - however, I have moved forward. Now please don’t mistake this for my saying not to let go, because I’m a big fan of letting go. But take that pain, frustration, and whatever else you may be feeling, and view it from a perspective of purpose. Even if this is the most difficult season of your life right now, you still get to choose your story.